বহু দিন ধরে' বহু ক্রোশ দূরে বহু ব্যয় করি,বহু দেশ ঘুরে দেখিতে গিয়েছি পর্বতমালা, দেখিতে গিয়েছি সিন্ধু।
I roamed many a mile over many days
spent a lot to travel to many countries,
and saw many a mountain range
and seas.
দেখা হয় নাই চক্ষু মেলিয়া ঘর হতে শুধু দুই পা ফেলিয়া একটি ধানের শিষের উপরে একটি শিশিরবিন্দু।
I had not yet learnt to see
the world that was two feet away--
a single drop of dew
on an ear of rice.
- রবীন্দ্রনাথ ঠাকুর/Rabindranath Tagore
*
Beauty has called me all my life and I would like to believe that for much of my life so far, I've always carried it within me and left with those who have met me, some trace of that great beauty.
There is great darkness in the world. Human beings are capable of as much terror, perhaps more, as the rest of the natural world. In the dark of night and light of day, in groups or in intimate spaces, they terrorize and brutalize each other. I know, having lived through much terror and brutality and having read, watched and listened to all kinds of stories of suffering and cruelty. There is no dearth of darkness, evil, the constant river that feeds our individual and collective suffering. So, then what?
For the most part of my life, I made the conscious decision to share little of my sufferings and in very careful places. There are some who can endure such stories, even grow from them. But for many, perhaps most, suffering breeds suffering. Darkness leads to further darkness and they forget their own light. Knowing what forgetting one's own light can feel like, I like keeping that light alive in others as much as possible. Art, always art, stories of hope, words of encouragement, nourishment, strength-- I believe that most people who have come my way have left with these things, no matter the darkness inside. But recently, I wrote a little on my darkness. And I saw again what I had forgotten-- that people flounder in darkness, they are incapable of living with it as a real and raw thing and sink at the sight of it, let alone working through their own experience of it. And perhaps, that is as well. Everyone's path and pace in life are different.
Someone shared something with me recently, where the idea of cultivating a peaceful inner world is mentioned. The brief introductory lines said that every image, word, thought etc. contributes to a certain kind of inner world and we must pay attention and cultivate a garden within because well it feeds us. It made me wonder about all the things I have been fed, things we feed each other unthinkingly. Moments of harm, pain, sorrows that we unthinkingly push onto others, which become a part of their inner world, which they must work through so as to not pass it forward.
At least I would not want to pass it forward if I can help it. As vast as darkness and cruelty are light and hope. It would be naïve of me to say that life is only beautiful and full of hope and joy. It is full of a lot of unthinkable which has the capacity for breaking life. It's all a part of it. But if you, like me, are called by something greater, won't you listen to it? Isn't Great Beauty worth the long walk into the dark?
Everyday beauties from my everyday life in three different cities.
From Hyderabad
From Mumbai
From Kolkata
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